Mamaw’s Beer Cheese

Last night, we found out that Mr. Jason Michael Cauchi, AKA Jax Taylor, was fired from Vanderpump Rules (it goes without saying that yes, Brittany was fired as well). The details surrounding their departure are murky — did Bravo execs realize the show needed a total overhaul? Did someone discover something questionable about their past actions/social media presences, a la Stassi and Kristen, who were fired earlier this year? I’m sure the truth will come out eventually, but in the meantime, let’s remember Jax and Brittany as they were on the show: full of drama, plastic surgery, and, of course, Mamaw’s beer cheese.

art by Alyssa Kurtzman

This recipe is an homage to Brittany’s Kentucky roots (served with vegetables that could have come straight outta Mamaw’s Kentucky farm gardens), Jax’s alcohol abuse (I added a splash of Tito’s to the beer mixture), and the overall spice they brought to the show, especially in earlier seasons (hello, Chipotle in adobo). Even though they were a bit of a drag in later seasons, I’ll always respect and appreciate their antics and what they brought to the table, from Jax’s constant cheating to Brittany’s deranged hookup with Kristen to their unquestionable commitment to each other. We’ll miss you, Jax & Britt — although something tells me you’re already developing a “bringing up baby in the Valley” spinoff with all the other preggo early cast members.

RECIPE
adapted from The Chunky Chef!

INGREDIENTS

• 8 oz. cheese, shredded (I used medium cheddar) 

• 3 tbsp. butter

• 3 tbsp. flour

• 1 cup whole milk

• 1 tsp. Worcestershire sauce

• 1 tsp. Dijon mustard

• 1/2 cup Bud Light

• 1 oz. vodka

• 1 tbsp. chipotle in adobo (sauce only, unless you want to get super spicy with it)

• Scallions (for garnish)

• 1 tsp. salt & fresh cracked pepper 

INSTRUCTIONS

Melt butter over medium-low heat. Add flour, stirring constantly. Add vodka, stirring until liquid dissipates. Add beer (keep stirring) — at this point, the mixture should be thicker than Jax’s post nasal drip. Slowly add milk, stirring well until it’s fully mixed in.

Add mustard, Worcestershire, salt & pepper, and chipotle in adobo (want it spicier? Just add more chipotle). Slowly add in cheese, whisking well until it’s fully melted.

SURv immediately, with farm fresh veggies from Mamaw’s Kentucky estate and a lukewarm Tito’s & soda.