Harry Hamlin’s Ham(Turkey) Burgers
Juicier than an infidelity rumor!
When Lisa Rinna first rolled onto the Housewives scene, it drove me INSANE that she referred to her husband by his full name every single time she talked about him. And she talked about him all the goddamn time! “Harry Hamlin likes this,” “Harry Hamlin would never do that.” Oh, how the tables have turned. I am now a full fledged fan of Harry Hamlin as a name AND a person. Yes, there have been whispers of infidelity. Sure, there have been family problems to work through. But through it all, Harry remains a simple man who likes: 1) camping, 2) cooking for his family, and 3) being a generally handsome homebody. What’s not to like??
“Yes I do the cooking, yes I do the cleaning” — Harry Hamlin, probably.
Harry is the type of Housewives husband I love, because he and Rinna seem to have a truly equal partnership. It always skeeves me out when there’s an obvious imbalance of power/money, and it’s clear that, with all her flaws, Rinna is a hustler. A woman who does a Depends commercial so Amelia Gray and Delilah Belle can go to college (or at least live it up in NYC in their early 20s) is a woman I respect, and the man behind that woman is the one and only Harry Hamlin. I like to picture him walking languidly through the aisles of their neighborhood Erewhon, holding up a $7 hydroponically-grown local organic tomato to catch the light before giving it a slight squeeze and putting it gently in his basket. He drives home, enjoying the time to himself, waving at his neighbor and giving a small smile. It’s time to fire up the grill and make some motherfucking turkey burgers (we ARE still in LA, after all… beef? In this economy? No thanks).
Weirdly, this is not an actual PEOPLE cover, but another wonderful photoshop by Alyssa Kurtzman!
Here’s my take on Harry Hamlin’s turkey burgers, with a little word of advice: you can experiment a LOT with a turkey burger, and you should, because they are notoriously lacking in flavor. But if you keep an element of umami (in this case, soy sauce, although Worcestershire would work well too) and freshly chopped herbs, it’s bound to be flavor packed and moist AF.
RECIPE
INGREDIENTS
1 lb. ground turkey
1 tbsp. fresh parsley, finely chopped
1 tbsp. fresh chives, finely chopped
1 tbsp. fresh scallions, finely chopped (green parts only!)
1 tbsp. soy sauce
1 large egg, beaten
Tomatoes, lettuce, sharp cheddar, mustard, ketchup, pickles, caramelized onions etc. (for topping)
Buns (brioche add a nice richness that turkey sometimes lacks!)
INSTRUCTIONS
Mix ingredients together and form 4 patties. Cook in cast iron pan (or grill!) over medium high heat, about 4 minutes each side or until cooked through.